Worrying about something will make it turn
out better than if you didn’t worry.
Worrying about something
will make it turn
out better than if you
didn’t worry.
This is so obviously ludicrous when
it’s written
out, it’s laughable, but many of us
still act as if
it were true. If your worrying points
out a risk
that you can take action to mitigate,
then go
for it, but worrying alone helps
nothing. Yet we
often act like we’re falling down on
the job if
we’re not worrying.
If you find it hard to quit cold
turkey, this story
may help. A. J. Jacobs,
editor-at-large at
Esquire magazine, did a life experiment where
he started outsourcing more and more tasks to
personal assistants in India. First he had his
assistants doing research and clerical tasks,
then he had them take over his
correspondence. He kept giving them more
assignments as he thought of things he didn’t
like doing. Finally, he realized he was spending
a lot of energy worrying about a big project he
was working on, and decided to try outsourcing
his worry. He didn’t outsource the project, just
worrying about it. He asked his assistant if she
would worry about it in his stead, and she
promised: “I will worry about this every day.
Do not worry.“ It worked: “Every time I started
to ruminate, I’d remind myself that [my
assistant] was already on the case, and I’d
relax.”
After I read this, I realized I was worrying
about a lot of things, and it wasn’t
accomplishing anything. I don’t have an
assistant in India, but A. J. does, and I figured
if she’s already worrying about his stuff, it’s
not
much more trouble to worry about mine, too.
So I decided to pretend to outsource my
worrying to her. Every time I felt myself
beginning to worry or dwell on something
upsetting, I just told myself A. J.’s assistant
was on that and I could stop. Nothing came
out any worse for my not angsting over it, and
I felt a whole lot better. Over time,
shortcircuiting
my worrying this way has become a
habit, and I worry much less.
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